Trips & Tales

AFMC Spotter's Guide

by Arthur "Living Legend" Einstein • May 31, 2004

AFMC Bikers, dressed for the road in helmet and riding gear, are sometimes hard to identify. AFMC offers this first edition of its semi-official spotter’s guide, based on observations made during its recent Canyon Tour 2004 (Originally advertised as Geyser Run 2004)

Rich Marin, Tourmeister
Biggest and tallest of the AFMC species. Creates routes, hosts and leads AFMC formations. AFMC VIP (Very Insistent Passer). Has been known to pass a camper, and then pull to the side of the road in order to have the pleasure of passing it a second time. Makes no apology, claiming he pulls over to ‘admire the view’.

Bob Kirby, Vice President
Long-legged, Georgian BMW rider. Often rides bikes previously owned by Tourmeister Marin. Rarely seen without passenger, who continuously offers riding tips focused on keeping the bike’s speed in check. Apparently hard of hearing when wearing helmet. Also a Very Insistent Passer who’s managed to pass everyone except Rich.

Jean Kirby, Vice President
Female of the Kirby species and constant pillion rider. Always wears helmet but never suffers ‘helmet hair’. (How does she do that?). Her distinctive cry “slow-down-Bob, slow-down-Bob” sometimes manages to curb his speed but only for short periods. She recalls Ruth (a maiden of Moab, by the way) and her biblical pledge to her mother-in-law Naomi (Book of Ruth, 1, 16 Old Testament) “whither thou bikest I shall bike, whoever thou passeth I shall pass”.

Walt Lynd, Chairman
Harley-chested curve carver. Strict observer of road-code. Barks at AFMCers sloppy signaling and slovenly road manners. Bark worse than bite. Insists the flock ride staggered, but to no avail. Frequently comments that we ‘ride too fast’, but never fails to keep up with the pace. Easily identified by his ‘tats’ (Walt’s tattoos have tattoos). Recently confined to van for short periods by a wing injury.

Jay Ladd, Vice President
Quintessential stealth rider. Recently spotted aboard BMW Green R100RS. Often seems to disappear from view, riding far behind the pack on long straights. Emerges from the underbrush in the curvy bits. Especially favors switchbacks where he attempts to ride up Rich’s tailpipe. This territorial jousting is fun to watch if you can get anything like close to the action.

Steve Larsen, Vice President
Gold helmeted Goldwing jockey. Current habitat Minneapolis, where he migrates frequently to native feeding grounds, Phoenix AZ. Migrates to AFMC events in long day-rides. No stranger to technology. Recently spotted with two GPS devices mounted on handle-bars. Claims to be testing them for Motorcycle Consumer News. Practiced Larsen-spotters believe he’s more likely using them to find longest possible route between points A and B to prolong the day’s ride.

Seattle Bob Meador, Vice President
Red blooded K1200RS rider. Easily spotted carrying radar detector, GPS, iPod, a week or two’s stash of socks-and-underwear, plus enough tools on board to repair a nuclear submarine. Living proof of the old adage that ‘tools make the man’. Acquired name Seattle Bob on an extensive tour of the west, when he joined the flock at a clover-leaf in Green River UT, to distinguish him from other Bobs on the tour.

Arthur Einstein, Vice President
Grey-bearded long timer. Frequently rides at back of pack, especially after gas-up stops. Apparently challenged by inserting ear plugs while wearing riding gloves. Believes that when AFMC flock stops at museum it should do more than just visit rest rooms. Carefully peruses museum exhibits causing restlessness among AMFC VIPs who are eager to get back on the road and start passing campers again.

Bill Karry, Vice President
Grizzled road warrior. Appears over the horizon like Lawrence of Arabia, having ridden great distances on his hump-backed GS1100 to reach AFMC feeding grounds in Utah. In recent years appears at AFMC events with his son Nick, who lives in Germany at present. Rides at a deliberate, gentleman’s pace on AFMC tours so his son won’t know how fast he really rides.

Nick Karry, Vice President
Curly crested road runner. Rides in the accepted Easy Rider’s style with star-spangled bandanna covering face to protect his model’s profile, Diet Coke contract, and soap-opera-star future - also perhaps because the BMW Cruiser he rides has windshield the size of a potato chip. Lives in Köln, and is official AFMC German interpreter. Rides at a deliberate gentleman’s pace on AFMC tours so his father won’t know how fast he really rides.

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